doing much, much better now.

a big "thank you!" to those who talked to me today. I WILL try harder. I WILL be better. even if it's only marginally so on Tuesday. just a few things to put down here that I have a feeling I will forget...
"a) get more sleep, b) be careful of what you say and do, c) rely on yourself for happiness"
"you need to push yourself a little to talk to me too; I can't be the only one talking in our conversations and I don't know what you want to talk about either"
"even though college will separate us, you'll meet new people.. we're not the only people on the planet, after all"
"dude, I know how you feel.. don't be discouraged by it, even the best of us are afflicted with it"
"I'll be there for you"
"think of yourself FIRST. your own sanity and well-being takes priority over everyone else's"
"the world revolves around you"
"I remember when [insert embarassing moment].. I know your frustration right now"

it feels so good to be close.. to have your hand on my shoulder, even if it's only for a few brief moments.. I won't doubt anymore.

homecoming was actually pretty awesome. the basketball games were intense, even though we didn't win in the end.. we have spirit! D + #! D + #! hehe. that bit of creativity made me laugh. (the pound sign is a fence)

I'm so wiped out right now. I just got home about two hours ago. spending 16 hours at school in one sitting can't be good for one's health. a subtle apathy took over me at school, but it gradually turned to a mild depression, then into, surprisingly, glee. even though I'm tired right now, I still feel a sense of giddiness from all that happened today.

speaking of health.. my leg joint is still bothering me. I can't walk properly. I really hope it gets better by the time track & field starts; it would really suck for me to start a sport with an injury incurred by, of all things, zero period P.E. I hope I don't have to use crutches.. I really don't want to use them.

in any case, I've been up for almost 22 hours now. it's time to go sleep. to those who are going to winter formal, enjoy your time there; to those who are not, make use of the free time and plan something fun!